You are not in an alternate universe. Nelson Mandela didn't die in prison, it's spelled "Berenstain" Bears, Sinbad never made a genie movie called named "Shazam," and there's a huge enthusiast community for the Dodge Dart. Yes, the 2013-to-2016 Dodge Dart. Our own Andy Kalmowitz wrote a joke letter from the perspective of someone who purchased a new Dodge Dart in 2022 because the concept is inherently funny. Of course there was an unsold Dart six years after production ended, and who in the world would buy it?

Here's the thing though: Darts aren't bad. They're pretty beloved, actually, and not in some "I drive a Yugo because it's funny" kind of way, either. Go into the Dodge Dart Forum, a thing that exists, to find upbeat discussions of Dart builds and maintenance, and info on Dart events. Byron Hurd at The Drive stirred Dart fans this year when he joked that of the 299,000 Darts in existence, maybe seven are rust-free. His inbox was inundated with Dart aficionados telling him about its greatness.

Perhaps the Dart's greatest sin is getting compared to the OG tiny modern Chrysler: the Dodge Neon. You may remember the Neon's adorable face in 1990s ads that greeted us with a "Hi." It hit its apex with the SRT-4, offering budget speed that rivaled pricier sports sedans. Then the Neon knight in shining armor disappeared and Dodge unveiled the Caliber, which Consumer Reports summed up with the following: "The engine is noisy, and fit and finish are sub par. Ride quality is sound but unexceptional and handling is lackluster, though ultimately secure." Dang, Consumer Reports, why don't you poke it in the eye and give it a paper cut, too?